We walk and live amongst happy-face people, yet we sometimes don’t know how many broken hearts lie beneath those smiles. We could be one of them, couldn’t we?
Not everyone is hiding or putting on a brave front, but some people do. And ironically, some of us are joyful—yet there’s this underlying sadness that remains in our hearts. Perhaps of an ongoing hurt, loss or a relationship hanging on its last thread.
In that way, you are not alone. We are not alone. We are all wired to love, to look for love, to be loved. And in the same way, we hurt, we’ve been hurt, and we’ll be hurt again.
To live a stone-hearted life is akin to living life barely breathing.
Everybody Hurts, R.E.M.
If you feel like letting go (Hold on) If you think you’ve had too much Of this life, well hang on.
We usually celebrate those who rise above the storm. Winners who thrive in terrible situations in their lives. I do too. I love champions like that.
But some find it difficult to accept that there are people who love God dearly, who don’t blame God for their terrible situations in life, would still be sad, or even depressed.
One thing I felt uncomfortable and confused with the messages I received from certain Christian articles, some sermon messages, and well-meaning Christians, etc. is—the quick downplay of one’s emotions, situations (whatever it is), and the emphasis on perspective, God’s hope, faith…The keywords here are: quick downplay.
I know that He is in control. I know about changing our perspectives. I know about choosing our responses. I know all that. And we do need to have that and live it out.
But it doesn’t take away the emotions and pain, certainly not the situation. It’s hard to choose a good response to not cry when you are bleeding.
For me at my low point of life, being ‘preached’ that we should focus on God (while this is true), makes me struggle even worse. It makes me struggle with my struggles. That the sadness must be taken away because, you know, God is hope. It makes me feel guilty that I’m feeling sad when I have so many things to be joyful for. It makes me feel—less than a Christian.
In our zealousness to guide people back on track—have we moved too fast to point people to the bigger picture—unconsciously downplayed the complexity of emotions, and therefore desensitized pain?
Do that often enough, chances are the person will have enough strength to rise, one step at a time.
I cried at this scene. I can relate to me, and to the many others who are struggling. It’s one of the reasons why I never say ‘chin up!’ to people.
I have the tremendous blessings of a handful of people who were coal bearers during the winter season in life. These are the precious people who literally and figuratively sat beside me when I have no more words and no more tears to shed. God gave me His strength through them.
Receiving comfort on my bleeding wound, I can then better hear the message of hope.