The media has played a big part in influencing people on what is deemed to be ‘the norm’. Giving up on their marriage is one of them.
From Hollywood movies to Asian soap operas, the message is this: If it’s causing great unhappiness to both parties and there’s no workable solution in sight, then the only solution is to get a divorce.
One of my heart’s burdens is the health and well-being of marriages.
It breaks my heart to see marriages falling apart and in the process, dragging everything down with them.
Families are torn apart. Children are having to learn how to live a ‘new normal life’ when nothing is normal about broken families—despite what the media is saying to us.
Look, I am not trying to make a suffering relationship sound easy.
I am a product of a divorced family, as my parents divorced even before I went to kindergarten.
Later in my adult life, I find myself living with the consequences of divorce and being in a second marriage relationship—my husband’s second marriage; my first marriage.
I have seen firsthand how my step-daughter suffered during her earlier childhood, being torn apart from her shuffling between her biological mother, and her father who has sole custody of her.
I have had power struggle with his ex-wife for imparting different and conflicting values into my step-daughter. I have screamed through bitter arguments with my husband.
At this point, I have to say that while society dictates I call her ‘step-daughter’, in my heart, she is no different to me than a biological child. So it is only for the purpose of this article that I am using the term ‘step-daughter’.
To cut a long story short, our earlier years together was close to being hell on earth as a new ‘blended’ family. It wasn’t until all of us came to know Christ, starting with my husband, then three years later, where I too decided to surrender my life to Him that He took our biggest mistake and made it right.
We had to learn through the most painful way how not to live life selfishly. We had to learn how to love despite seeing how hopeless our relationship seemed to be.
[bctt tweet=”Both of you have to commit to the ‘No exit clause’ in your marriage from the beginning. ” username=”@melindayeoh”]
I am ever thankful for the lessons, horrible as they were. The hard lessons have taught us to close the exit door of our marriage. We decided that ‘there’s no exit clause’ in this marriage, and we are going to work it out, no matter what.
By God’s power, I believe that the ‘generational curse’ of bad marriages and divorces from both sides of our family has been broken. It stops at our generation.
My last take on this—please don’t wait until it’s too late to work on your marriage relationship.
If we go to a doctor or take supplements for our health, why not do likewise and take care of our marriage’s health?
Please get help, talk to someone you can trust, or seek counselling, and pray. Fight for your marriage relationship. Find a Marriage Course near you and invest in your marriage relationship and build a strong marriage.
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