It’s been weeks since I last prepared soup for my family.
Today is Monday. Where the church office is closed. For the past almost 6 months, my Mondays were not the peaceful off-day Monday that it should be. I was playing catch up over so many things that I needed to do.
As I was preparing the soup, I listened to Chip Ingram’s podcast. The message was right smack with my state of life. And I believe, to many people.
In the midst of business, what happened to Sabbath?
He asked, if you’ve ever said this to your friends, ‘Yeah, we’ll meet for coffee, one day.’Or you keep putting things off. You are heading for trouble.
My confusion point is- I have been hearing people saying you’ve gotta give your all, you’ve gotta push, you’ve gotta work like mad. (Oh, more so if you are in ministry).
So I struggled.
It’s not like I’m not enjoying it. I love the purpose behind what I do.
But really, I find the pace to be very tight.
I want to know why?
Is it a competency issue? Is it a tasks overload issue?
Is it I’m not relying on God enough?
All I know is, when I take my time to cut the vegetables for the soup, listening to the podcast, and then put the gurgling pot into the thermos, I felt very satisfied. Satisfied to prepare a hot home-cooked meal to feed the family.
I love the purpose of my ministry work. But I yearn to love more about being able to invest my time to care about people by action, not only in thoughts.
I don’t want to postpone calling up a friend who just lost her dad.
I don’t want to be anxious how long a tele-conversation will be if I call up my aunts.
I want to be able to spend time with people and listen to their story.
But I’m swamped. Barely have time to quiet down and hear my soul.
Thank God my time with God is being restored since last week. Started doing my quiet time again regularly.
I don’t want to be so busy that I missed out on life & people. But it just seems that not knowing how to juggle my work resulted it being quite insistent on pushing them out.
Time with family, juggle. Time to exercise, struggle. Time for God, juggle. Time for self, muffle. I feel like the balls I’m juggling keeps on spinning & increasing, that if anyone just add one little request and throw in another ball, I’ll drop all of them.